When you’re generally lazy and kind of got too much to do already sticking to a health regime is not easy. Yet as I stared at the bathroom scales and they kind of stared back diapassionatly I realised it was time to shove all excuses aside. I’m going to be honest here, my portion sizes are too big and I REALLY enjoy a glass of wine or three on a weekend. Occasionally I enjoy a complete bottle. I know it’s not great for me, but I like it, I like how it makes me feel, and I can finally afford good wine. Yet something has to give my friends. It is finally time to step up and be counted. Exercise and cutting back those portions is firmly back on the agenda.

Slacker

If was never really off the agenda to be honest, but hey, sometimes you want to cut yourself some slack and relax. Everyone tells me I have the best excuse to not be too hard in myself. I reply that very reason, my illness, is the very reason I actually need to be harder. Much harder.

Lots of things are hard when you have Parkinson’s. When I go to bed I take a slow release tablet to eke out some dopamine or some other chemical overnight. If I forget my limbs feel strange, kind of seriously stiff. My right arm sometimes seems to take on a mind of its own and hangs out to the right of my body awkwardly. I’ve found the best way of dealing with that is to place my hand on the wall and gently manoeuvre it back into line. I sometimes follow it up with a few stretches and it seems to come back. That, and the assistance of a handful of morning medications.

Chemical Romance

I have learned to adore a tablet called Madopar Rapid. As the name suggests it begins working quite quickly and I soon feel almost normal. As the other meds begin to do their stuff I feel back to my old self. Everything is fine! I’m back! What is all the fuss about? I can type and bend and move as well as I ever could.

But it never lasts. I have realised with sadness I can no longer take my pills when I think they might be declining in efficacy. I need to time them to avoid “drop-off.” I’m not very good at this and often find myself waiting to “come up” and start working again. In those in between times walking is incredibly hard, bending is terrible, yet I still try to push through like nothing’s wrong.

Small Gains, Big Wins?

Which brings me back to waking up and realising it’s time to go workout. I’ve worked out five times this week, I’m very pleased. The scales are less impressed but I’ve been told it takes time. I read a highly scientific study of – erm – a number of people with Parkinson’s who did HIIT three times a week for thirty minutes. After six months most of them showed evidence of neutral connection repair in the brain. I’ll admit that it’s a small study from the Yale School of Medicine. Very small. Er, ten people, in fact. Nine showed improvement. But what the hell. I have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Right?

I have been working out regularly for a while but lapsed a bit recentley due to, well, getting hitched for the second time. As much as I regret that, (so much regret) I must also give myself some slack. After all, I’m only human. Apparently this makes me occasionally fallible. I will admit that every time I do a workout, there is much shouting and I often cry with frustration, yet … I feel amazing afterward. And of course, quite smug.

On and On and On…

I don’t yet know if / when / why / what will happen. Yet I must concentrate on the now. I might not feel as though the exercise is working, but I can put on my socks and shoes easily enough. People tell me I don’t look like I have Parkinson’s. That’s always a bit weird. Because I do. And it’s not easy. What else can I put that down to but the persistance in exercise? I hate it / I love it.  I’ll never know really how much it has helped. I don’t plan on stopping and finding out what effect that has. So on with the exercise and keep taking those pills I guess. Oh, and some smaller portions while we’re at it.  

Until next time.