It’s been a funny week. Actually That’s not true, it’s been anything but funny in a witty kind of way, but rather it has been unsettling. It started off pretty well, recording new stuff with Emma, learning tai chi, then descended into seriously unpleasant behaviour from someone in my networking sphere. It left me thinking that maybe despite everything, misogyny is alive and well in 2025. Maybe.

My crime appears to be asking pertinent questions and offering to help. I suppose I should remember that confident, intelligent women should know their place. It’s not the done thing to helpfully explain how to connect a computer to a television, or point out potential issues with an idea in a discussion. Worse still, encourage others to participate in joint decision-making. Naturally if that other person is female, then clearly you’re leading a crusade.

Without outing the person in this situation, I’d personally felt subtly excluded and ignored for some time. I kept telling myself I was mistaken, surely this would all prove to be a simple mix up. This week I was told this person was having some difficulties, so I reached out to offer help and support. Hours later they replied, telling me in no uncertain terms that I was to blame for their issues, and some other stuff. Essentially I’m a horrible person.

I was stunned, saddened and yes, I was upset. I called a colleague and burst into tears. Shocked doesn’t really come close. Then of course, I took a step back and considered. This says far more about them than I. It tells me that perhaps I had been right all along, and maybe I really have been a victim of a subtle campaign to silence my voice, and the voice of other ‘troublesome’ women. Or maybe not.

Because that would give these people more credence than they deserve, especially if I think there really was real consideration behind this message. I’d be giving this person so much more power. I will not give people the power to make me unhappy and sad. I will not pipe down. I will not be silenced.

I will see this for what it is, a person lashing out at me in a moment of anger at something. I don’t know what. Maybe something horrible has happened, maybe they’re struggling with… I don’t know. They are clearly not in a good place and need all the help they can get. I was simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I shall choose to respond with kindness. I won’t lie, the old knee-jerk reaction is to push back in anger (Thank you 5 stages of change). But what would that say about me? I would become the very thing I am railing about, and I know that it’s never been my intention to upset anyone. I shall continue with what I know best, and that is to be understanding.

I shall take my life lessons and move on in a positive manner. If my path crosses this person in future, I shall be pleasant and calm. To forgive, truly forgive, is the only real path forward in unity and peace.

Until next time.